12 Easy Hacks to Fuck Any Girl

12 Easy Hacks to Fuck Any Girl

Janelle Moi by Janelle Moi

I was never a great looking guy. Even after I finally hit my growth spurt during my senior year in high school, I was still the ugly duckling in all of my classes.

Because of this, I never had the confidence I needed to hit on my university floor-mates - or any girl for that matter.

But a friend came along that next semester who made talking to girls look easy. I mean, the guy pulled cuties like it was second nature - which was surprising considering how average-looking he was.

One day I decided that I'd suffered enough, and so I asked him for some advice. What he told me that day changed my game forever.

And so today, I'd like to share some of his best hacks with you. Let's get into it.

Before You Start Reading: How to Tell if a Girl Wants to Fuck

Before You Start Reading: 7 Fuck Mistakes You Must Never Make

The Mistaken Identity

Flirting with girls is tough, don't be mistaken. But I think the act of approaching a cutie is the hardest part - at least, it was for me.

If you're at a party and a gorgeous girl catches your eye, there's no easier way to pull the moves on her than trying "the mistaken identity" tactic.

All you need to do is approach this girl from behind, lightly touch her lower back and curve around her while saying something like, "Jenna! Hey, what's up..."

The moment you look at her face, take your hand off of her in the most respectful manner you can. Immediately start apologizing for mistaking her for someone else, while also making some light conversation about how she looks "JUST LIKE this girl I know named Jenna."

All you have to do next is ask what her name is, and the conversation should flow from there. If not, don't worry.

Even after you perfect this move, there will still be a few girls who aren't interested. But hey, you're taking a shot in the dark and reacting to her reactions, so it's not going to work every time.

It's not a magic trick. It's just a way to spark a little friendly flirting.

Ask Them About Themselves

Everyone knows how much people love talking about themselves, and the only thing people like more than talking about themselves is being asked about themselves.

When you ask a girl what she thinks about (x), you're really telling her that her opinions matter to you. No mentally stable girl is going to hang by your side like a leech if you're constantly talking her ear off about what YOU like, or what YOU think.

Asking her questions about herself will make you seem like a genuine guy who might be looking for more than just a one-night-stand. If you are just looking for a one-night-stand, letting her know that is the last thing you'd want to do.

Just make some friendly conversation and see where it takes you. Sometimes it won't take you anywhere, but most of the time it'll give you some insight on what this girl is like as a person - which is vital information when you're hitting on her.

If you can remember some minor detail, she told you last time you saw her, bring it up in conversation this time. Girls love it when you can show off your listening skill. Just don't try to force it too much.

Know Your Type

When it comes to flirting, different girls require different techniques. You won't have any luck getting a shy girl to fuck you if you're being loud and obnoxious. Similarly, you won't have any luck with a loud girl if you're being too shy.

You need to match their energy level if you ever want to end up in their bed.

However, on each side of the energy level spectrum, are extremes that require a slight adjustment to your own attitude. For example, an incredibly shy girl will want a slightly less shy man to hit on her.

Loud girls are the same. You need to show a certain level of calmness if you want to grab their attention in the right way.

Be Cool, Man

"Cool" guys almost always get the girl - something that's painfully true.

If you feel the need to "be yourself" and show these girls all your cards right out of the gate, you won't have much luck. Girls want to see a guy who's calm and grounded.

Standing next to your friends and looking around the bar/party with a drink in your hand can be a good way to appear more mysterious. You'll be able to catch the eyes of a few close-by-cuties by doing little else than this.

Acting like you're scanning the room for someone will make a thousand thoughts run through the heads of these girls - and it'll all be centered around you: the mysterious guy.

It sounds stupid, but it works. Trust me.

Make Some Girl Friends

Here's a big one, guys.

Having a couple of girls that are just friends hang with you in a social setting can be a good way to show other girls how approachable you are - more so than those beefed up jerks who only care about smashing pussy.

Not to mention, these girls you make friends with will have friends of their own - and those girls are fair game. Plus, a common connection can be a good talking point.

Sometimes your girl friends will even try to set you up with one of their other friends if you tell them "in confidence" how cute you think (x) is when she plays with her hair like that.

Dress Fuckable

This one seems like a no-brainer, but stepping up your attire can make major waves in the cutie community.

When you dress like you're about to go one the WoW raid of a lifetime, you're building a barrier between you and the hot girls I know you want to fuck.

Girls nowadays like guys who can dress in a way that reflects their attitude. For example, a laid back guy should dress laid back. You won't see a guy like they wearing boat shoes and a neon polo - they wear basketball shorts/sweats and big t-shirts.

High-energy douchey guys like to dress like well, high-energy douchey guys. I shouldn't even have to describe the look for you.

Guys like that might be douchey, but at least they look the part. Looking like Dungeons and Dragons night in human form isn't going to do you any favors.

Leaving Her Hanging

Trying your hardest to get some pussy is a decently effective method for scoring, but it's a short term solution.

When you're mingling with roughly the same crowd of girls every other night, it can benefit you to chat certain girls for a while, only to abandon her to hang out with your friends.

This shows her how dedicated you are to impressing her, only moments before you completely forget she exists. Obviously, you aren't really going to forget her, but ditching her to hang with your boys is an excellent seed to plant in her mind.

I know this is borderline "girl" behavior, and I'm usually not one for mind-games, but this move works almost every time.

But it only works a week later when you see her again and get her contact info. How will you get it? Well, she will make sure of it since she won't want you to forget about her again.

It's a long con, but it's worth the wait - trust me.

Tell Jokes

Some of the ugliest motherfuckers on this planet are, coincidentally, the funniest. Sure, handsome guys have an instant boost when it comes to first impressions, but when you're funny enough to make the whole table laugh - it's game-changing.

Other than the obvious "Funny people are more fun to be around" trope, I thought I'd expand on some evidence I found.

Basically, being funny makes you more fuckable for several reasons, one of which is your overall intelligence. Being funny, clever, quick-thinking, and level-headed is a key indicator that your cognitive fitness is looking good.

Being funny also shows a girl how easily you can make a situation less tense, but diffusing it with humor instead of violence.

Because contrary to what you may believe - women like the clever wordsmith more than the barbaric meathead.

Don't Burn Your Bridges

Once you start using these tips to land cuties every weekend, there might be a little tension at the hang-outs you regularly attend. Every girl knows almost every other girl - so it's incredibly important that you're being nice to ALL of them.

Not just the girl who touches your arm every time you say "Hi" to her, but the girl who threw a drink in your face the week before as well.

You're going to want to master this since getting laid relies heavily on other girls' opinions of you - especially her friends.

So it's just better to cover all your bases instead of being a dick to ant one girl (or group for that matter).

Eye Contact

While there are times when starring at the goods can increase your chances of hooking up, there are many more times when it'll do quite the opposite.

When you're talking to a girl you want to fuck, be wary of where your eyeballs are. If you're looking straight into her cleavage from the moment you walk up to her, to the moment she walks away, she'll just see you as some pig that only ever has one thing on his mind.

If you can avoid looking at passing girls while you're talking to her, that'll give you points too, so the best approach you can take is looking straight into her eyes.

Don't glare at her like a serial killer. Just look into her eyes and smile now and then when she talks to you. If you're answering one of her questions, it's OK if you want to look away for a brief moment - it'll make you look more natural.

Physical Interaction

When a girl is interested in you, she will lightly touch you in some cute way. It's exciting, while not being too forward - which is exactly what you should be doing.

Keep in mind that when I say "physical interaction," I don't mean "physical harassment." You should NOT be groping these girls at the hangout. In fact, you shouldn't even try touching a girls thigh - just her arm.

By giving her a light touch on the arm once or twice throughout the conversation, you can break the physical contact barrier - inviting her to touch you as well (which she will).

It's all about being comfortable, and when she's feeling comfortable hanging off of your arm, then you've done very well.

Avoid Wasted Girls

Some scumbags think hooking up with a girl requires little else other than a drunk girl who needs a bed to sleep in. Those same guys are the ones everyone talks shit about.

Being the "hero" for a drunk girl might seem like a good idea at the time, but it's just not necessary. If you've ever found a drunk girl who has ditched her friends to "go on an adventure," you're going to want to help her look for her friends.

They are 100% looking for her, and returning her to them gives you all kinds of points that'll come in handy later.

Be careful that you don't try and make yourself out to be the knight in shining armor. The very most you want to do is ask, "Is she going to be alright?" and when they say yes, just wish them a good night and walk the fuck away.

Acting like a heroic deed is no big deal can be a great way to give off that "mysterious" feeling we mentioned before.

In Conclusion

Well, we made it. The end of the road - well, not really.

It's more like the beginning of something beautiful for you since I just gave you every tool you'll ever need to make yourself as fuckable as possible.

It doesn't take too much from you. Just be a decent human being, be real with yourself, and be flirty enough to get a response (good or bad) from the girls.

I guess believing in yourself wouldn't hurt either.

Jessie is online and wants to fuck.